Stay-at-home-feminist, part 3

This is the third in a series – click here for part 1.

It goes without saying that this present calling of being a stay-at-home-feminist wasn’t answered without some rebellion.  It’s hard to imagine any educated woman in 2010 who would not start to feel a little bit listless, a little bit restless, while staying at home with a little human.  At some point, you can’t help but wonder if your mind were not going to turn completely into mush from the lack of intellectual stimulation.  It’s not hard to feel like you, your academic pursuits and lifelong dreams have all been benched on the sidelines, and therefore you can’t help but be incited with a desire to be more productive.  I think this comes from the fact that God has placed in each of us an aching need to have meaning and purpose.  We want and need to contribute to the world.  However, being knee-deep in diapers and spit-up and held captive in a never-ending cycle of sleeplessness doesn’t make you feel like you’re contributing much to the world, much less, capable of doing so.

During my first few months as a new mom, I constantly felt this urgent, pressing need to do something productive.  I didn’t want diapers and breast milk to be the sum total of my existence, but at the end of each day, I found that this was pretty much the depiction of my life. When asked what I was doing with my life, it was hard not to insert the word “just” before “being a mom.”  While friends were launching new ministries and advancing in their careers, it was hard not to think of myself as “just” standing still.

But is it really “just”?


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