How I Became an Egalitarian: Following God Anywhere

This is Part 5 in a series that started here.

In the midst of all this ministry, God continued to speak to me about my calling.  This mainly came in the form of the question, Are you willing to follow me anywhere I lead you?  Will you go where I send you — down any road and at any cost?

My answer, “Yes, Lord.”

His question, “What if I sent you to the ends of the earth?”

My answer,  [silence].

I knew I had a long way to go in the faith because I truly wrestled with the ability to die to the flesh.  As a true suburbanite, I did not want to go to the ends of the earth.  It was the one thing that I withheld from God.  Though my best friends couldn’t wait to head overseas long-term, I was pretty happy where I was.

Me, “Lord, couldn’t I serve you right here?”

The Lord, “But what if I want you somewhere else?”

I knew that my answer had to be yes, for how could I call him Lord if I said no to him?

It was this yes of full surrender that allowed me to learn God’s heart for the nations — that God’s desire from the very beginning has always been that all people on the face of this earth would know him and experience his blessings (Gen. 12:1-3).  But how will they know if someone does not go (Rom. 10:14-15)?  Like Isaiah, I heard God say, “Whom shall I send?  And who shall go for us” (Isaiah 6:8)?  And, after much wrestling and battling, I volunteered myself.

And this also made the most sense to me, because I knew that the mission field was the place where I could definitely use my gifts.  Since I still couldn’t see myself (or any woman) having the position of pastor, I felt like my gifts must be pointing — God must be pointing — me to the mission field, where it was sanctioned for a woman to preach and pastor.

Click here for the next part in the series.


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